Alan, YOU'RE the one who's awesome. Thanks for that thoughtful response. Lots for me to consider there. I DO believe in equality and power balances--I wouldn't ask him to hold off while I have all the fun though. I'd be like...go for it. I'd be glad he found someone to meet those physical needs, because I don't want to.
The question then goes to, well why even stay married? Well, I would be ok if he wanted to leave me, but in my opinion, there are plenty of other areas where we are good together.